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It’s good to be a self-sufficient, know-it-all, and dependable person. However, if it’s at the expense of yourself, watch out! You’re heading toward a dangerous road. Today, Arlene interviews Nancy Levin on 3 of the most common myths and misconceptions about setting up boundaries: 1) Only certain personality types need to set boundaries; 2)  It’s other people’s job to uphold your boundaries; and 3) Boundaries make you a mean and inconsiderate person. Nancy also explains how having boundaries is different from having a rigid wall around you and how to communicate boundaries for a harmonious relationship. You can say “No.” with grace and gratitude without having to apologize for the things you cannot do. The key to setting healthy boundaries is to live your truth because by then ít has become a way of life.

 

“Your boundary is yours, and it’s between you and you. It is our job to honor respect, uphold our own boundaries.”-Nancy Levin

 

Highlights:

03:18 Boundary- Definition and Myth #1
05:30 Boundaries And Collaboration
08:30 Boundary Myth #2
15:40 How to Communicate Your Boundaries
21:27 Boundaries- Point of Motivation
24:00 How to Set Up Boundaries Without Resentment
26:14 Say Your “No” With  Gratitude, Without Apologies 
28:54 Your Present Moment Choice

 

Resources:

Book
Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free: The Ultimate Guide to Telling the Truth, Creating Connection, and Finding Freedom by Nancy Levin

 

[bctt tweet=”How do we set healthy boundaries for life? Join @arlene_gale & @nancylevin in breaking 3 of the most common boundary myths we might know or have heard as accepted truths. #BookWritingBusiness #BusinessBuildingBooks#boundaries #collaboration #resentment #truths #harmony #myths #NO #presentmomentchoice ” username=””]

 

Quotes:

05:17 “Having healthy boundaries is a foundation to having a fulfilled and satisfying life where you’re living life on your own terms.” -Nancy Levin

08:39 “Your boundary is yours, and it’s between you and you. It is our own job to honor, respect, uphold our own boundaries.”-Nancy Levin

10:01 “When we’re living under this idea that the goal of a relationship is harmony, then we are invested in doing whatever it takes to make everything okay.”-Nancy Levin

11:59 Boundaries is just naming what I’m going to do to take care of myself.”-Nancy Levin

16:50 “Someone else’s response to our truth is not our responsibility to manage.” -Nancy Levin

18:02 “When we are chasing gold stars, no amount of gold stars will ever be enough to fill the void.” -Nancy Levin

25:29 “Resentment builds when we don’t actually give voice to our truth.” -Nancy Levin

29:14 “Our present moment choice predicts our future. We have to start getting conscientious about the choices we’re making and see that there is a cause and effect.” -Nancy Levin

 

 

Meet Nancy:

Nancy Levin is a Master Integrative Coach and Best-Selling Author of several books, including  Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free. She’s formerly the Event Director at Hay House for over a decade. Nancy is the creator of the 11 Life Coach Academy and offers in-depth coaching and training programs designed to support clients in making themselves a priority and setting boundaries that stick. 

 

Transcription:

Arlene Gale: Welcome everybody, this week we are talking about the myth of the successful do it all people pleasers who look like they have it all together. Come on, be honest, you probably know some of those people, and if you say you don’t, then hmmmm, are you that person? Because there’s a lot going on with that sentence. The myth that we have to be all things to all people, even at the expense of ourselves. That’s dangerous and it’s unhealthy. And I can say that because I’ve learned how to set boundaries in my relationships professionally and personally, and it can be a difficult thing to do, but it really has had a positive impact on my overall health and wellbeing as well as the depth and connection I make with other people. Because I don’t feel like everybody’s always out to get me or get something from me all the time because there are boundaries. But before I started studying and looking at my own boundaries, I didn’t really understand what a boundary was. I mean, I understand the boundaries that go between one state and another state, or between the US and Canada, or the US and Mexico. I mean, I get those boundaries. So how do boundaries work when we’re talking about relationships?

So right now I have more questions than I have answers, but luckily for me and even more luckily for you, we do have an expert here today to talk to us about what is a boundary? Are boundaries good or bad? Is there a certain personality type that has more trouble with boundaries? Like I said, I’ve got so many questions. Let’s see if we can find some answers from my special guest today, her name is Nancy Levin. She is a master coach and bestselling author of several books including her newest, latest one called Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free. She’s formally the event director at Hay House for over a decade she did that. Nancy is the creator of the Levin Life Coach Academy and offers in-depth coaching and training programs designed to support clients in making themselves a priority and setting boundaries that stick. Those last few words seem very powerful, boundaries that stick. I used to have squishy boundaries. So let’s talk to Nancy Levin about squishy boundaries and all other things related to boundaries.

Hi Nancy, how are you?

Nancy Levin: I’m wonderful. I’m happy to be with you and all your listeners.

Arlene Gale: Well, I’m excited that you are here too. So let’s start with something that seems kind of basic, but even with my work limited, you know, I know enough about boundaries to be dangerous. So I just want to start by asking you something that seems kind of basic, but what is a boundary when you’re talking about personal and professional relationships?

Nancy Levin: Yeah, so a boundary is a self-defined limit. So these are our limits around what we will or will not do, will or will not tolerate, and will or will not accept. I mean, at the bottom line we’re looking at, a boundary is what’s okay and what’s not okay. And then there’s also the boundary, much like the way you were talking about in terms of delineation of state to state, or borders of countries, there’s the boundary line of where I end and you begin. And this is the line that is often very blurred for those of us who may have had trouble or challenges setting boundaries in our lives.

Arlene Gale: So our boundaries designed to keep people in or out, or how does a boundary differ from building a wall around yourself?

Nancy Levin: Yeah, so most people, and this is really one of the myths about boundaries, people often think that it’s about keeping something out, there is also the way that we carefully choose and consciously curate what to include in our lives. So we’re being very mindful, and we’re being very conscientious about what we want and what we don’t want. And for those of us who have been people pleasers, it can be very tricky to get in touch and get in contact with the wanting because we have often prided ourselves on having no needs and we have actually found our worth and value in doing for others. So we find our worth and value in self-abandonment essentially.

Arlene Gale: So does that mean only that personality type or that type of person needs boundaries, or does everybody need boundaries?

Nancy Levin: I believe that having healthy boundaries is a foundation to having a fulfilled and satisfied life where you’re living life on your own terms.

[bctt tweet=”“Having healthy boundaries is a foundation to having a fulfilled and satisfying life where you’re living life on your own terms.” -Nancy Levin” username=””]

Arlene Gale: It sounds like boundaries, the way you’re talking about it are good and can be positive and powerful, but can boundaries also be unhealthy or bad?

Nancy Levin: I personally don’t like to go to the good or bad. I would rather stay with healthy, you know, use that language. And where we can get into trouble with boundaries is when we make a wall, as you mentioned before, we make a wall and we’re not willing to reassess things that might need some reassessment. So boundaries can shift and change as we grow and evolve. So they’re not set in stone, they don’t have to always be the same line in the sand because as we change, we may shift around what’s okay and what’s not okay.

Arlene Gale: So as we grow, and mature, and gather more experiences and more life, I guess, then our boundaries will probably change.

Nancy Levin: Yeah, they can shift. And part of what happens is if we are living really truthful lives, where we are expressing our needs as we go, we’re expressing our preferences, we’re expressing our desires, we are in collaboration with the people in our lives instead of compromise, instead of acquiescing when we’re in a really open, honest relationships, what ends up happening is setting boundaries becomes a way of life. So it’s ultimately the idea is that we’re not having to set or enforce the boundaries because we’re simply living that way, we’re living in our truth.

Arlene Gale: So then you’re saying that with setting boundaries, there’s room for negotiation?

Nancy Levin: There’s room for, I like the word collaboration more than negotiation.

Arlene Gale: Okay, why?

Nancy Levin: .Because I think collaboration feels to me more win-win than negotiation.

Arlene Gale: Mm, okay.

Nancy Levin: I think that for many of us who are coming at boundaries from a place of the people pleasing, we are the ones who have tended to acquiesce, where the ones who have tended not to speak up, not to state our needs and so the resentment builds. When our needs are going unmet for so long and we’re actually thinking that it’s someone else’s job to meet them, the resentment continues to rise. And the reason the resentment is rising is that we’re not actually expressing what we need, we’re not expressing our truth. So in collaboration, it’s a conversation, it’s communication, it’s connection.

Arlene Gale: And that’s a huge myth that I think so many people have about boundaries is that, you know, it’s your job. It’s your job to hold me accountable, it’s your job to love me until I can love myself, it’s your job to uphold your reason in such a way that it makes me happy. What do you say to that?

Nancy Levin: Yeah, I would say that is the number one boundary myth. That it’s someone else’s job to uphold respect or honor your boundary. Bottom line, your boundary is yours, and it’s between you and you. So it is our job to honor, respect, uphold our own boundaries so we can have boundaries with others that we don’t even name to another person, because ultimately, we’re the ones who need to maintain it.

[bctt tweet=”“Your boundary is yours, and it’s between you and you. It is our own job to honor, respect, uphold our own boundaries.”-Nancy Levin” username=””]

Arlene Gale: So what do you say to somebody if they come to you and they say, ‘put Nancy, that sounds so hard. That’s so uncomfortable.’

Nancy Levin: Yeah. So here’s the thing, we’ve been living with a lot of discomfort up till now. When we are abandoning ourselves for the sake of another, when we are under the illusion that anything we do can make someone else happy or make someone else mad, we are in that people pleasing, we’re pretzeling, we are peacekeeping. And the bottom line here is that when we are keeping the peace at all costs, it comes at a very high cost. It takes a toll on us because ultimately we’re living under this idea that the goal of relationship, and I’m not just talking about intimate partnership, I’m talking about your relationship with your mother, your boss, your children, anybody. When we’re living under this idea that the goal of relationship is harmony, then we are invested in doing whatever it takes to make everything be okay.

[bctt tweet=”“When we’re living under this idea that the goal of a relationship is harmony, then we are invested in doing whatever it takes to make everything okay.”-Nancy Levin” username=””]

Arlene Gale: Well, that’s interesting because you brought to mind something, I love my husband, don’t get me wrong, but he is one of those quote unquote conflict adverse people, and I think we’ve entered into a healthy boundary or negotiation, or we’ve come to some resolution and he smiles and nods, and then I realized that either I hurt his feelings or he didn’t hear me, or for whatever reason didn’t want to continue that conversation. How does somebody set a boundary with somebody who’s conflict adverse?

Nancy Levin: Yeah, so again, it doesn’t need to necessarily be voiced. However, if it is voiced, it’s very important to start the conversation with I not you. So a boundary is not telling someone else what they can or cannot do. A boundary is NOT starting with you always, or you never, or you have to. A boundary is, I feel uncomfortable when you raise your voice. So I’m just letting you know that if you keep yelling in order to take care of myself, I’m going to go take a walk around the block and come back and see if we can continue then.

Arlene Gale: No, that’s a great formula. And I’m just thinking, yeah, because so many times when we get in conflict with someone else, it’s all about what you did, what you didn’t do made me feel.

Nancy Levin: That’s right. Exactly. So again, it’s I feel X when you do or say Y, so in order to take care of myself, I’m going to do Z.

Arlene Gale: Hmm.

Nancy Levin: So boundary is really just naming what I’m going to do to take care of myself.

[bctt tweet=”“Boundaries is just naming what I’m going to do to take care of myself.”-Nancy Levin” username=””]

Arlene Gale: Hmm. We’re going to take a quick break, but I’m pondering something here, and I’ll give you some time to think about an answer. But when we come back, I’d like to talk about, when we’re in relationships with other people, we have introverts, extroverts, we have you people who are more commanders, and other people who are more relaters, individual one-on-one kind of people versus people who like to get up and command a group. How do people that have personalities at those extremes, how do they set boundaries and then honor each other’s boundaries? If that makes any sense at all. So when we come back with Nancy Levin, we’re going to talk about setting boundaries within different personality types, and maybe see if she can give us some nuggets that we can work on in our personal and professional relationships. So we’ll be back in just a moment.

So welcome back everybody. This is Arlene Gale and I am talking to my special guest today, Nancy Levin. She has a new book out Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free. This is a fascinating topic, and I left and teased everybody to come back and listen to what kind of words of wisdom would you have for dealing with different personality types, and setting, and then honoring boundaries.

Nancy Levin: Yeah, so again, the boundary that we’re setting is really our promise to ourself. The commitment we’re making to ourself to take care of ourselves. So it’s less about the other person.

Arlene Gale: So it’s less about the relationship and it’s more about being true to who we are. It really doesn’t have anything to do with the other person.

Nancy Levin: That’s right. It really doesn’t have much to do about the other person. Now, I gave you in the first part a little formula to use, I feel X when you do or say Y, in order to take care of myself, I’m going to do Z. So that’s when we’re dealing with someone who can meet us in connection and communication. We can also build into that formula a question of, really to check in and see what the other person is available for. So stating our needs and our preferences, and then seeing if the other person is available to us in this. So I feel X when you do Y, are you willing to no longer do Y? It’s like the example we had, I feel scared, I felt uncomfortable when you raise your voice at me, are you willing to work on your anger? Are you willing to work with a therapist? Are you willing to do something to work on your anger? Are they willing to do something?

Arlene Gale: Okay, so that’s where I was getting with in my mind is I can set my boundary, but if my coworkers, or my peers, or my boss, or my husband, my children, if they don’t quote buy in, then what good does it do me to have a boundary if I’m all by myself.

Nancy Levin: The good it does you is that you are taking care of yourself. Like I said before, so I’m just letting you know that if you keep yelling in conversation with me, I’m going to leave the room, I’m going to hang up the phone, you’re naming what you’re going to do.

Arlene Gale: Well, and that’s an interesting point too, because sometimes with boundaries, I’m going to do sounds like a threat, or it’s so huge that if you do that again, I’m going to divorce you.

Nancy Levin: It’s not IF YOU THAT AGAIN, I just want you to really pay attention to the language. I’m really a nitpicker about the language.

Arlene Gale: No, I think that’s great.

Nancy Levin: Not IF YOU DO THAT AGAIN. So I’m just letting you know that if you keep doing that in order to take care of MYSELF, here’s what I’m going to do.

Arlene Gale: Okay. So it’s not that takes — ultimatum.

Nancy Levin: Not an ultimatum. Because we have no control over what someone else does or doesn’t do. That’s their choice.

Arlene Gale: Oh, that’s a biggie. That’s a biggie. We can’t control anybody else’s actions, we can only control our reaction.

Nancy Levin: Yeah. And here’s the other piece of this, someone else’s response to our truth is not our responsibility to manage.

[bctt tweet=” “Someone else’s response to our truth is not our responsibility to manage.” -Nancy Levin” username=””]

Arlene Gale: Wow. That’s a big weight lifted off of a lot of people’s backs, I would imagine.

Nancy Levin: Because we get so invested in wanting to caretake someone else’s experience that we end up biting our tongue, we end up muscling through, we end up stuffing it down because we’re so used to taking the hit. And the truth is that we are not living authentically.

Arlene Gale: So I read an interesting story that really put a bunch of pieces together for me as part of your book. And it was your story about taking care of and moving Wayne Dyer around. First of all, I’d like for you to recount the story of rescuing quote unquote rescuing him, and how you would do that differently with healthy boundaries.

Nancy Levin: Yeah, thanks. When I was the event director at Hay House, I was at that point in my life, very invested in chasing the gold stars and external validation, and I will say that, the bottom line here is that when we are chasing gold stars, no amount of gold stars will ever be enough to fill the void.

[bctt tweet=”“When we are chasing gold stars, no amount of gold stars will ever be enough to fill the void.” -Nancy Levin” username=””]

Arlene Gale: Amen.

Nancy Levin: So yeah, everything we’re seeking externally needs to be resolved internally first. So in this particular occasion, and the long story is in the book, but I was on tour with Wayne Dyer. We had an event in Atlanta on a Saturday and an event in Detroit on a Sunday. And we did the event on Saturday. We flew to Detroit late that night, Wayne realized he didn’t have his briefcase, and was going on and on. He needed his briefcase to go on stage, he had all of his notes for the talk, he had all of his notes for his next book, he was really desperate, he was a little manic. He wasn’t blaming me in any way for the briefcase, but he really made it clear in no uncertain terms that he needed the briefcase to go on stage tomorrow. And it was about 10:00 o’clock at night and I had to first locate the briefcase which took a couple of hours, and I finally did. And then now it’s a little after midnight then I had to see about how we were going to get this briefcase from Atlanta to Detroit. And it being late Saturday night, there was really no one who was coming through for me, none of the airlines, none of the freight, the place who had the briefcase which is actually the car company that took us to the airport, since 9/11 you can’t just put someone on an airplane with something that isn’t theirs. So the long story short is that about four in the morning, I find myself on the way to the airport booking a flight for myself in the car and I flew to Atlanta, the guy met me there with the briefcase, I turn around and go back through security, of course they have to pat me down because it’s very suspicious to land and then get right back on a plane.

Arlene Gale: With nothing but a briefcase.

Nancy Levin: Right, exactly. And I called Wayne and said: “Wayne, I’ve got your briefcase.” And he said: “Where are you?” And I said: “That’s not important. I have got it.” And he said: “Did you do something crazy?” And I said: “I’ll see you at the venue.” So I pull up to the venue just about the same time he gets there, and we’re doing an event for a couple thousand people. So there are a couple hundred people around his car, and I am walking toward him holding out the briefcase pulling my leg, he says: “Oh, that old thing, I don’t need that.” And I, in front of all these people flipped off the father of motivation. And then I took him on stage as I always did because I emceed all of our events, and he made me stay with him and he told the whole audience: “Let me tell you about this woman just did for me.” And the truth is, back to your question, I did it because I wanted the accolade, I wanted the approval, I want it to be superwoman, I want it to be the one and the only one who could do that. And if I were to do something like that now, I would need it to be SOLELY from being of service.

Arlene Gale: So where along that story would you have done might have done something different if that were the goal?

Nancy Levin: Yeah, I mean, knowing who I am, I might have at the point where there was no way for the briefcase to get to me without me going to get it. At that point I would have said, it’s not possible for the briefcase to get here. You’re going to have to go on without it tomorrow. We’ll get it somehow shipped to you Monday, whatever. But I would have stopped at that point. I would’ve looked, I know me. I would’ve looked, I would have tried to find a way, but at the point where the only option was me getting on an airplane, I would have stopped.

Arlene Gale: Well, and if this were just an isolated incident–

Nancy Levin: But it wasn’t.

Arlene Gale: It wasn’t, this was a way of life day to day, seven days a week for you.

Nancy Levin: It was. And it’s funny because, in looking back, I mean, if I may say, I was exceptional at my job, but what made me exceptional was being boundary less. So who I am today could not do that job in the way that I did it.

Arlene Gale: Because it wasn’t about serving. It wasn’t about serving from your heart and making a difference, it was more about, when I get this there, he’s going to pat me on the back. It was all about his reaction to you, is that what you’re saying?

Arlene Gale: Yeah, I mean, it was both. I mean, I loved my job, and I had tremendous heart involved, and I was very attached to the idea of the impact we were making with these events. But it was absolutely coupled with being the hero, being the one and the only one.

Arlene Gale: Well, and living that way, day after day after day, did you find that it was taking a toll on your health?

Nancy Levin: It wasn’t until I stepped back. It wasn’t until I left my job. I will say it took me about a two year period to really fully detox from that persona.

Arlene Gale: So it’s almost like you don’t realize how tired you are until you get a good night’s sleep and then you realize, wow, I’ve been really tired.

Nancy Levin: Yeah. Because ultimately, I had been projecting this image to the world, this image of perfection to the world, and I had been really carefully managing the perceptions of others. So I really only wanted people to see me through the lens I gave them to see me through. And that takes a LOT of energy.

Arlene Gale: It does take a lot of energy, and that in itself is 24/7. So what was the first step that you took in becoming a more healthy boundary full?

Nancy Levin: Which was really coming in contact with my own preferences. So I had been someone who prided myself on my independence, my self sufficiency, and having no needs. So I needed to come into contact with preferences, with desire, with wanting, with being able to receive. And this is one of the really low stakes steps that I will often offer clients to begin the process of setting boundaries. If someone asks us, what do you want to have for dinner tonight? Where do you want to go for dinner tonight? The default response is usually is, ‘I don’t care. What do you want?’ Right? So I will often coach my clients to just begin with taking a moment and actually checking in with yourself. What do I actually want? Huh? I want sushi tonight, and to actually name, I really want sushi tonight. That alone is a big step for so many. It sounds small, but it’s actually huge.

Arlene Gale: Yeah. One of my children can tend to be, ‘Hey, whatever. I’m just easy going, and go along to get along.`  And then there came a point where he would say: “Oh, I don’t care.” And then we get someplace that my other son would suggest then, then he gets all pouty because he really did care, he just didn’t want to say anything.

Nancy Levin: Right. Like we were talking about resentment before, the resentment builds when we don’t actually give voice to our truth. So even if I want sushi and you want Italian and we decide, Hey, let’s go for sushi tonight and Italian next week, or vice versa. I can guarantee that I’m not gonna feel the resentment that I would have felt, had I not named what I wanted?

[bctt tweet=”“Resentment builds when we don’t actually give voice to our truth.” -Nancy Levin” username=””]

Arlene Gale: Right. Wow. I was doing something right as a parent and I didn’t even realize it.

Nancy Levin: Yes. And then another way this comes up a lot is when we say YES, when we really want to say NO.

Arlene Gale: Yes. I’ve gotten to the point, if I say no or let me check my calendar, which isn’t really a no, I’ll get back to you, and people continue to push me, then I’ll say: “I apologize, but if you need an answer right now, the answer has to be no.”

Nancy Levin: Yeah, and that’s what I often tell clients: “If you can say no, out of the gates, say no. And if you can’t say no, let the person know that you’ll get back to them tomorrow.” And then I really want people to understand that we can say NO with grace and WITHOUT needing to apologize and actually say that we can actually give a no with gratitude. Even if it’s, thank you for the invitation, I’m not able to make it. Or I appreciate you thinking of me. I’m not available, without apologizing.

Arlene Gale: Right.

Nancy Levin: And without a song and a dance, without a story, an excuse, a reason. We don’t have to give a reason for our no.

Arlene Gale: Right. That’s why in the podcasts I talk about becoming masters and successful without excuses or apologies.

Nancy Levin: Exactly.

Arlene Gale: Because I don’t owe anybody else an explanation about how I work in my life, how I schedule things in my life. And that’s not meant to be mean, it’s just meant to be that I have priorities that they don’t really need to know.

Nancy Levin: Right, and that’s the thing. Another myth about boundaries is that boundaries makes you mean, or boundaries makes you, the B word.

Arlene Gale: Yeah. The opposite side of that for me was learning that when I asked somebody for something and they said no, it wasn’t about me. It’s about that they have the things that they do, and it’s not that I’m less than or not good enough, or whatever. It really is them honoring their boundaries. And if I respect our relationship, I have to let that go.

Nancy Levin: Yes.

Arlene Gale: And respect myself, I have to let that go.

Nancy Levin: That’s right.

Arlene Gale: Interesting. Lots of good stuff here. But before we wrap this up, Nancy, I want to put you on the hot seat and ask you three quick questions, you ready?

Nancy Levin: Sure.

Arlene Gale: So we’re talking about mindsets related to boundaries. So what was a mindset about boundaries and the way you were living your life that was a big hindrance towards moving you towards success?

Nancy Levin: The mindset that was a hindrance.

Arlene Gale: A hindrance, yes.

Nancy Levin: Thinking that other people are more important than I am.

Arlene Gale: Okay. So when you got to that place and that became the center for you, what was the mindset that helps you move past that?

Nancy Levin: That I am as important, if not more important than others. I have to make myself more of a priority.

Arlene Gale: So as we wrap up this episode, what is one nugget, one little golden nugget takeaway that our listeners can implement now about either checking on their boundaries or setting boundaries, you pick.

Nancy Levin: Yeah. For me, it all comes down to present moment choice, to really paying attention to the choices that we’re making in each moment. Because I believe that where we are right now is the culmination of every choice, decision, and action we’ve made up until now. So if we want to, I will often say choice, our present moment choice predicts our future, it is the crystal ball. We have to start getting really conscientious about the choices that we’re making and see that there’s a cause and effect.

[bctt tweet=”“Our present moment choice predicts our future. We have to start getting conscientious about the choices we’re making and see that there is a cause and effect.” -Nancy Levin” username=””]

Arlene Gale: And this matters and it’s important both personally and professionally?

Nancy Levin: Absolutely.

Arlene Gale: Okay. Well, Nancy, this has been fascinating. I’m kind of tongue tied because my brain is moving and processing all of the great information that you’ve provided, and thinking about how to apply it in my own life, so I’m really excited about my listeners doing the same thing. So with that, can you tell people how or where they can get your book? Or how they can find you and connect with you? If they’re interested in any of your coaching programs.

Nancy Levin: Sure. Everything is on my website, nancylevin.com. And if you go to nancylevin.com/checklist, all one word, so nancylevin.com/checklist, you can download a free, it’s called the BOUNDARY BADASS QUICK-TIP CHECKLIST, and you can get that for free. And everything else is right there on my website, you can get my book where books are sold.

Arlene Gale: Cool. I like the name, I may have to go check it.

Nancy Levin: Yeah.

Arlene Gale: That’s a good name. And are you on social media where they can connect with you?

Nancy Levin: Yeah, I’m on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, all the things. If you go to my website, there are links to everything.

Arlene Gale: Oh, wow. You’re so organized, I’m very impressed. So that was more of a shame on me moment because I need to get better organized. Technology keeps leading me instead of vice versa. So anyway, Nancy, thank you so much for your time today. It really was a wealth of information, and I wish you the very best on your latest book, Setting Boundaries Will Set You Free, love the title. What I’ve been able to read it, I love, and I highly encourage people to get it. I am assuming it’s on Amazon? Is it on your website too?

Nancy Levin: It’s on Amazon, my website, it’s in hardcover ebook, and an audio book too. And it’s me reading.

Arlene Gale: Oh, yay. Well, no excuses for not getting this great information on setting boundaries in your life. So again, thank you Nancy so much for being my guest today. It was a great eye-opening show.

Nancy Levin: Thanks for having me.

Arlene Gale: And listeners, before we leave, I want to leave you with this. ‘Do not let the world dictate your story. Be mindful of the stories you tell yourself about what is or is not possible for you. You get to choose to live your own story your way everyday.